Recovery... Rest... Revolution... A Rant
This time last year, I was suffering from severe pain and pressure in my head and eyes due to intracranial hypertension (IIH) and trying my best to finish out the semester at IU Indy with a cerebrospinal fluid leaking from my nose. I felt just as lonely and isolated as I did during my quarantine when I contracted COVID-19 in January 2021. It’s almost hard to believe that the height of the pandemic was only 3-4 years ago. That feels like a lifetime ago, and like it just happened at the same time.
Right now, I am dealing with a reoccurrence of the pain and pressure in my head. Gratefully, it’s nowhere near what it was last year. Yet, it is still just as fatiguing and has come with a painful, chronically dry left eye, which is incredibly frustrating because I feel like I am sleeping my life away.
Questions I keep asking myself.: Why is resting so hard? Why do I feel weak and lazy for surrendering to what my body needs?
My Reflection(s):
Growing up, I loved books, music, TV, and video games (all the same). This was how I rested. This was how I escaped from the uncertainty of parenting my parent and still managing to “have a childhood.” From my experiences, all I’ve ever seen is the revolution written and televised. From learning of the Harlem Renaissance of the ‘20s and ‘30s to witnessing the Black Renaissance of ‘90s TV, my perspective on life has been shaped by revolutionary actions.
Contrary to popular opinion shaped by Gil Scott Heron, I’ve always believed the revolution (in part) has been & will continue to be televised. Media has always played a part in the revolution, from self or witness written documentation to pictures and film capturing revolution in action and those being shared through screens. The internet and various social media platforms give us daily and immediate access to historical and current revolutionary acts as they move to completely replace (cable) television, which is surprisingly still kicking in the era of streaming services and on-demand entertainment.
I do believe our liberation, however, won’t be televised. What freedom, joy, and rest truly are and feel like for us can never be fully captured. Why do you think those, “You had to have been there,” moments happen? To remind us to find our tribe (like-minded individuals), and build/protect/sustain our village (community) so that we may be well and live a life worth living.
Whether that’s virtually, physically, or both, it’s time out for the whole “I can do bad by myself” mentality and understand that none of us, not one of us is in this life alone. A wise soul shared with me once that alone really means all one. A reminder that we are all connected.
I believe this to be true. We are all connected to what is (Earth, God, Life, Spirit, Universe, Truth, etc.). Being aligned with the oneness of life and still celebrating + embracing the uniqueness of how it is expressed from Earthling to Earthling and culture to culture is truly revolutionary and what humanity and living this life is all about.
Now, are we meant to do some things solo, as our own person? Absolutely. That’s the beautiful part of being a unique individual within a collective as a part of this life experience. However, even during seasons of solitude, we must be intentional and tap into that oneness to remain connected and grounded in our reality.
These seasons of solitude, while necessary, are often avoided because we struggle to be still. We struggle to sit with ourselves and our truths. We refuse to face our sh*t.
What is our reality? The construct we know as normal is crumbling and will not “bounce back” like usual. The cycles and ways of capitalism, colonialism, depression, hostile takeovers, extreme individualism, oppression, racism, war, and white supremacy are ending.
I know you’re probably thinking well where are all the zombies and the horrible dystopia that media has always shown the apocalypse to be?!
Are you sitting down? Are you ready?
We’re living in it! Think about it. We have been brainwashed to accept our current dehumanized state as the only way to live (surviving is implied) and programmed to distrust & destroy what doesn’t match that reality. Add in escapism by way of drugs and sex, plus the way so many of us are ruled by our phones (and other conveniences/tech gadgets), sounds like zombies to me. Just sayin, it’s a wonder all of our brains aren’t complete mush by now. Or maybe they are and that’s why many of us are so complacent with the benefits we receive from participating in this oppressive system.
And let me be completely honest with you suga, I just don’t see how anyone can still be in denial that we’re living in a “dystopian future.” Let’s examine some hard truths about our current state of living:
Crime, hate, ignorance, and violence are rampant.
They’re glorified and normalized. Day by day, more are desensitized to the hatred and violence towards Black bodies, Black joy, and Black communities here in the divided states of amerikkka. Let alone all of the conquering (wars) and genocides that are taking place across the globe.
The DotCom Bubble and The Big Tech Boom have led to the brainwashing of the masses into putting productivity over personhood and has made cyberbullying the new norm.
This has almost completely destroyed our ability to connect in real life and has us disconnected and often falsely engaged through social media and virtual reality. And the way the trolls run rampant out there on the internets… Observing behavior patterns on social media has shown me that most are rarely satisfied by anything that another does. Good or bad.
There’s a significant and unnecessary deficiency among most people in existence when it comes to meeting basic needs.
It has become so costly to just exist day to day, let alone live and experience this life. There’s nothing natural or “normal” about working over 40 hours a week across multiple jobs and still being unable to meet your most basic needs.
So, here we are in 2024 seeing and saying the same things we were in 1994, 1964, 1934, 1904, 1874, 1844, 1814…
I said that to say that generation (I use a 30 year span) after generation after generation… has tried it the same way, with little to no variances. As an advocate for honoring our history and traditions, I still believe in the power of evolution and innovation.
Across the diaspora, we are known and praised for how we remix and spice up everything, yet fear has the majority of us feeling trapped (for good reason) when fully liberating ourselves.
When will more of us recognize, work through, and transmute our pain and rage to create the life we know is worth living with those who are like-hearted, open-minded, and ready to build?
I hear often, like The Nap Bishop, “It must be nice to rest.” My response has been and will always be, “It is. Join me.”
I know I am asking a lot in this moment. And I do not take that lightly, suga. I am asking you to trust me. Trust me when I tell you: We have the time we need, yet we do not have time to waste. Our responsibility is to manage and negotiate our capacity and energy wisely. Time is not to be managed and manipulated. It is to be enjoyed and experienced.
The Revolution:
Now is the season to fully commit to our individual healing, liberating ourselves collectively, and living in our natural state globally. Rest is our pathway in the physical, dreams are our gateway in the spiritual, and our mental health reflects our current state of well-being.
This isn’t just a statement or mantra. It is revolutionary. It is the revolution. It is a call to action. To let go. To be still and rest. To embrace a natural lifestyle. To reclaim our divinity and the sacredness of our humanity.
Parts of the revolution will be shared visually with the world. Most of it won’t. That’s not ours to carry. Our responsibility is the healing and nurturing of our whole selves. That’s it. In healing ourselves, we heal our children, our families, our friends, our communities, and our world.
Our healing, our rest is reparations. The freedom of flowing at a natural pace without guilt is our birthright. And much like history has shown us, we must fight for and take our liberation. It will not be given.
Yet our fight is not physical, not right now. We must fight by resistance. We must resist by being still. With rest comes divine wisdom, clarity, and healing. This fight right now is spiritual. Which means it’s also mental. The physical will simply react to our internal state. When we heal our minds and spirits, we heal our emotions and our bodies. Thus healing this world.
Don’t believe me? Think back to the stories we heard about Earth, Life regenerating amidst the worldwide quarantine at the height of the pandemic. I genuinely believe that we were seeing the fullness of the realities of how we’ve been living thus far and the true possibilities/realities of what is to come if we don’t redirect our course.
The pandemic showed me two things:
(1) Capitalism = death. It was built on death and destruction, thrives on death and delusion, and will see its demise due to death and dissent.
(2) Trading, the literal exchange of goods and services for compensation, is natural and will always find its way.
So what does this mean? We must define living and what we value for ourselves and live. We are meant to live as our authentic, healed, and whole selves, beautifully and boldly. It means letting go of the need/want to control and react and accept the responsibility of what is yours to nurture and protect instead.
All in all, we must individually and collectively live a natural and sustainable lifestyle that is in harmony with nature on this Earth. Let us usher in a new era of living for ourselves and recover from the state of survival forced on us. May we create a new world, a healthier world, together. Otherwise, we will all meet our end so that Life can regenerate and begin again.
This post was inspired by the work of Tricia Hersey, The Nap Bishop, & her book, Rest is Resistance
Disclaimer: I am not responsible for any feelings you may feel while reading this or the book mentioned above. I am responsible for my comfort, my peace, and my joy. I am responsible for me , my self, and mine (my business, my tribe, and my village). I am responsible for my part in the fight and protection of our freedom. Consider yourself forewarned that being connected to me, in any way, may lead you to healing, the discovery of your most authentic self, and the restoration of your natural state.
Tricia Hersey and I at the launch of her new book, We Will Rest! at Semicolon Books in Chicago, IL (November 12, 2024).
Save the Dates
Global Day of Unplugging: March 7, 2025
World Sleep Day: March 14, 2025
Spring Forward Retreat: March 21-23, 2025
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I create content and share my life experiences to show how I tapped into my intrinsic power and turned my pain into purpose through recovery.
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